The Barber Pranks Rank

As a parent of three young children my days are generally filled with laughter and joy... (ok, maybe some yelling too)

Today my almost 4 year old (whom I will refer to as THE BARBER) --you need only to go back several weeks to view the pictures of her hair cutting ability to know from whence the name has come. Anyway, my almost 4 year old perpetrated a prank... on a scale that has thus far not been experimented with by either of her older sisters.

It was clever, it was diabolical... and it had no specific target.

I'm no child psychologist... but I think at this age... pranks and jokes ... even the best thought out... are generally perpetrated with immediate gratification in mind...

The Barber has always been .... more devious.... more cunning... but she is oh so cute! It's a diabolical combination!

So, today The Barber perpetrated a prank that only I (as the only adult in the house) and now you (as my confidantes) will see it for what it is..... true genius.

Here's what happened:

My almost 7 year old went potty.

After a few moments she started screaming
(the kind I scream you'd expect if someone looked over to the left and noticed a tarantula sitting on their shoulder)

She started yelling The Barbers Name...
and she was laughing hysterically!

Turns out.

The Barber took all of the wipes out of the wipe container and replaced it with............. water.

My almost 7 year old felt the weight of the container and thought it was full of wipes, she struggled with the lid and finally opened it... with a splash.

That my friend... was a trap.

Yup. She'll be 4 this July. I'm in big big trouble.

Have a great day!

sshhwwweeeewwwwww I feel much better

I just read the update on the Dysfunctional Office blog or "DOB" and I finally feel like I can wait for the next installment... And, while we wait... I have a little something for Rosie or DOB fame...

I know it's not a very big picture... but I was thinking you could right click... save it to your My Pictures... then use it.... as your desktop wallpaper.

Unless you think it will just remind you.

Well, we wait with bated breath for some entertaining tales of DOB yesteryear. In the meantime let me give you an update about the gang here at Rosie the wonder dog house.

First... the winner of the Name the Online Bookstore is....... (drum roll please)

ATTIC STAIRS BOOKSHOP (or did you know that already)... hhhmmmmm I think you did. Now I'm just working on the graphics for a logo! THEN T-SHIRTS! I LOVE T-SHIRTS!

So, as soon as I have some free time, I'll be putting the website together, hopefully that will be soon because I now have about 700 books... maybe even 1000... Yes, I know... it's a veritable book explosion!

Here's what happened. A local Friends of the Library group had their annual book sale.. which was huge and they didn't come close to selling all of the books. For some reason it occurred to me that there were a lot of books and a couple of weeks after the sale I called to see what they did with the books they didn't sell... and it turns out..THEY WERE GIVING THEM AWAY!

So, my minions and I descended upon the library and got a ton of books. My brother went during the day and painstakingly open and shut hundreds of books looking for first editions. I went the following day with my friend and her daughter and we took literally a whole van load.

I would have taken more if I could... because yesterday the 1000's of books that were left over... were going to the dump.

(a little reminiscent of Fahrenheit 451 if you ask me)

Today I am taking the kids to my ex-husbands house... so that he can spend the day with them. Normally he would wander up to my house about mid-morning and he would return them to me by mid-afternoon... but this week he requested an "overnight" which... I have come to realize is code for: I want you to bring them here, so I will propose the unthinkable so that you will compromise and bring them to me so I don't have to do all the driving.

Somehow, I think if he actually said, would you bring the kids here this Sunday and I'll bring them back... it would be easier on my nerves then the stress of having starts and stops of talking to someone that constantly contradicts his previous statement.

Talking to my ex-husband is like watching retrospective film footage of the president on The Daily Show. You know, where they show a clip of the president saying something during his first term in office, and then saying the opposite in his second term of office. The difference is, that my ex-husband does that in the same sentence... nay... the same breath!

Him: "I want to pick up the kids on Saturday so they can stay over night"
Me: "Well, I'm not sure, do you have beds?"

Him: "Yeah, I have three beds, 'cause I have that trundle bed"
Me: "Well, trundle bed makes 2 beds"

Him: "Ok Yeah, I have 2 beds"
Me: (thinking)

Me: "Are you the only one living there?"
Him: "What are you crazy? You better just get all that out of your imagination, I am the only one living in this house. "

Me: "It's not my imagination, you offered rooms to someone I know and told him that you were already renting out some of the rooms"
Him: "oh Well, I was just thinking about it, it never really happened"

So you see... the life of a liar doesn't change much.

So, it's 5:40am. I'm going to hop in the shower... then wake up the kids and we are going on a mini-road trip to his house... I will be depositing them on his door step around 8:00am. (all going well) and he can spend the day with them.

I know you will all agree.... OVERNIGHT is out of the question.

AND that... is my update. Spring is right around the corner... although my weather.com splash screen says 26 degrees... the high will be 48, which is almost 50, which is much closer to 60-70 which is SUMMER TIME WEATHER!

OK... I gots to go!

Have a great day!

Dueling blogs - baaw baaw baaw

First, let me just put your mind at ease.... baaw baaw bawww baaw (that my friend, is the written sound of a banjo... plucking the first few notes of the infamous... dueling banjos) - (which, as another side bar, never fails to remind me of the movie deliverance, which also reminds me of the time I drove through some mountains in Tennessee... which in turn reminds me of the 2:00am "Feed the Children" info-mercial... which brings me back home... with the face of my hair trimming 3.5 year old who never fails to look like the little urchin sitting on the front porch of the Appalachian shack)

Moving right along....

I am writing today, because I am jonsing.... for a dysfunctional office update. When last we heard from our heroine (is that how you spell it if it's a drug or is that a female protagonist?) Anyway, Rosie (not to be confused with The Wonder Dog) was investigating the theft of her Humongous burger...

and


and

and

that was it.

done.

I need to know..... did a new burger miraculously appear on your desk? Did Enrico Suave (or whatever the dudes name is) 'fess up to his slide to the dark side? AND... more importantly did Paris Hilton figure out if she was still wearing her protection. These are all questions I need answered! (keeping in mind, I didn't ask about the downstairs bathroom... of the fur ball puking cat)

And So.... with no remorse... I create this blog entry SPECIFICALLY to get you to create one!

To those that want to know... check out the dysfunctional office here!
http://dysfunctional-office.blogspot.com/

Don't worry... sob sob... I know it's pretty entertaining... sob... It's not like you won't come back to me... right? At least once in a while... and read... my ... mutterings? right?

Just Kidding.

Their blog is a HOOT!

A MUST SEE

have a great day!

The Happy Booker

Well, thank you all for taking my little "Name the bookstore survey" -(which is still located on the right hand side... if you are so inclined) The winner by a landslide is:

Attic Stairs Book Shop

NOW.... for the logo

I am currently accepting logo submissions... and you can email me at atticstairsbookshop@gmail.com

You can hand draw a logo and scan it and send it... You can computer generate a logo and email it... whatever you do, it has to be original art... so I don't get in trouble when I use it...

AND THE WINNER GETS.....

That's right folks... The winner gets... A free T-shirt displaying their logo and the book store website!

A FREE T-SHIRT! I know, I know, it's hard to believe... that a simple thing like helping me brand my online book store would provide you with such riches... but it's true!

Here's how it's going to work!


I will be accepting logo submissions for a while... when I have collected enough... I will put it to a vote. You can submit as many as you want! You don't have to submit pictures, your logo suggestion can just be the arrangement of the name "Attic Stairs Bookshop" or... there can be a picture... doesn't matter to me.

Meanwhile, I will be working out my own idea for the logo.

Anyway... After my book room underwent a stunning transformation... I am very excited to get my books all listed on the different services. Based on your responses for my "Name the bookstore" survey, it seems like most people go right to amazon for their reading needs. Did you know about alibris? or Biblio? these are websites that specialize in out of print books.

Anyway, I have to go refill my cuppa coffee.

OH... shout out to B - who is under the weather... and as he put it... my household must be doing well... because he seem to be sick whenever we are not. Looks like we won't get over to see his new digs until the summer time! HA HA HA AHA


OH... we planted seeds... and aside from a minor flood (cause by an over zealous 4 year old and a water can) the plants appear to be doing very well. Now I need to prepare a couple of flower beds for the ---over 400 seeds we planted!

Fortunately, my sister will be taking some of the seeds back to her house to planting... I hope!

My windowsill apple tree is doing well, it is over an inch and a half! The kids were so excited when they saw that the seed had actually started growing... My 4 year old was especially joyous and happily informed me that we would save a lot of money this year buying apples... I had to explain how slowly trees grow... from seed...

That's it!

We are all well... Life is good! Spring is around the corner... Summer is swiftly approaching...

Have a great day!

before and after picture

BEFORE

AFTER

BEFORE

AFTER

BEFORE

AFTER

MORE AFTER

STILL MORE AFTER

I hope you enjoyed my little pictorial. This is all thanks to CLOSET-EXPERTS... Located on the web at http://www.closet-experts.com/ They give free estimates over the phone, and they serve all of New Jersey!

This is my new bookstore home... although I need to increase my inventory and will probably need more shelves..atleast I can find what I have.. and as most of you know.. I have several other rooms I can fill up! Bwaaaaaa haaaaaa haaaaaa haaaaaaaaaaa

Believe it or not, I only have about 90 of these books listed... and I have about... oh... 300 I need to get listed. I just downloaded the free trial version of booktrakker. (http://www.booktrakker.com/) and I spent a very pleasant 45 minutes chatting with the tech support guy Andy. I think his software is going to work very well for me... I'm hopeful it will run on Vista.... did you hear that sound? That's me crossing my fingers! HA HA AH HA AH AH AH

I hope you enjoyed the before and after pictures as much as I enjoy walking into that room and being able to find the book I just sold!

Have a great day! Don't forget to visit my ebay store... and VOTE on the used store name, so i can build my website!

Talk to you later
Happy Holiday! ah, heck....screw being politically correct... I'm going out on a limb and wishing you a HAPPY EASTER.

New Survey!

Click this link to participate!

http://www.polldaddy.com/s/FC20D854BD25F947/

Long Time No Hear... or write

OK... sorry.

I have been SUPER busy. Went to a KICK BUTT book sale, where all the books were in great condition and very inexpensive... AND... I have been working like crazy to get them listed on ebay.. but it seems like it is a snails pace... considering I have (no exageration) over atleast 100 more books to list... but probably more like 200... I am trying to come up with the easiest way to get all the books listed .....

http://stores.ebay.com/New-Jersey-Garage-Sale

Couple of things... funny. B used my blog as an example of a blog in a workshop he ran... that's pretty funny, especially since the last entry in the blog was the ... nose plug entry. I'm actually afraid to re-read that entry... I can tell you this. it was written during a time when I was under diress..

Anyway, I'm much better now. no plug.

The kids are all healthy... the dog is well... the living room is clean, the clothes are folded and the pizza box is 1/2 full. Life is good!

Tomorrow Closet-experts (www.closet-experts.com) will be working on my spare room that currently houses my book inventory to provide me with shelves and a shipping station. I have taken some before pictures... although... I believe you will remember the before pictures of yesteryear......

(the screen should be getting fuzzy... and what's that... the picture starts to resolve... it's wall to wall.... CLEAN CLOTHES THAT NEED FOLDING!)
HA HA HA HA HA AH

yes, I may hold the guiness book of world records for the most titles for the spare room. it is currently, the spare room, the kids computer room, my book inventory room and previously the laundry-waiting-to-be-folded room.

Hey, who needs a big house, when we have.... words.

Ok, several other things

remember my daughter who cut her hair... you will NEVER believe what happened.

The day after she cut her hair bangs down to her scalp (not the week after, not a couple of weeks after... THE DAY AFTER) she got her picture in the local newspaper.

Yes, that's right. My two youngest were caught at the local fun fair creating sand art... and my youngest hair design was in full and close up view.... this paper is intent on creating memories! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

I recently reconnected with a high school friend. She has a 3 year old daughter who enjoys playing with my kids so it's been nice and fun to have someone around that I haven't seen in a while. Incidently, we have plans to work on the book store together, it will give us something to work on and help that we both have different schedules and abilities!

Now.... I have been thinking. In this day an dage... Hip names are just as powerful as product... I was thinking of the name of my online books store..... what do you think.

NJ Books N Things
Aunt Fannys Used Books
Attic Used Book Store
Buzz Buzz Books


Here's what happened... I was day dreaming about a logo... and though Aunt Fanny's Used Books would be a great used books store name, because I could have a great logo with an old auntie and her used books... big smile, big teeth, hair in a bun... fat butt. HA HA HA HA HA HA sitting in a rocking chair. Then I can also sell.... (you old timers already know where I'm going...) T-shirts!

Just a little reality check... my three little darling girls are now playing... Zombies! HA HA HA HA HA

Hey that's good.

How about Aunt Zombies Used Books!

HA HA HA HA HA

OK... I'll take you suggestions. ... let me think... was there more... hhhmmmmmmmmmmm

That's it for now, I'm goign to check out our friends in idaho to catch up with them!
have a great day!